15 January 2013

Small Stones- Day Fifteen

"Why don't you like me?  Daddy does."

That was a lasso made of ice,
and it just frozebrokestrangled my heart.

It's normal, I know.
I enforce discipline, teach respect.
He's testing, learning the variance of two homes
instead of the solidarity of one.

I know it wasn't meant.
I know ours is an iron bond.

But... shit.
That really was a stone.

13 comments:

  1. Oh, my dear. I know well the razor of which you speak... a stone, indeed. Sending you comfort, and love.

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    1. All is okay... just the sting of that first time. Not only the words, but how he's growing and learning to use them... both for communication and now coercion of sorts.

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  2. I do like you. It's my job to make sure that you grow up to be liked by a lot of people. :)

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    1. We talked. I said plenty along those lines. It wasn't that I didn't know how to respond- my visible reaction was appropriate, I feel.

      It's the fact that it was said at all.
      That we've reached this point.
      Growing pains. :)

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  3. whoo, shit.
    that really was a stone.
    xx

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    1. Yes. Thank you for just acknowledging that. <3

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  4. Beautifully said Sybil. You're right to know better. It hurts, but shake the sting and look ahead. Know that you're in good company. Kids, no matter the family situation, will test boundaries and words. They learn. You're dang straight - your bond is iron. Love, different from like, hurts sometimes. Yet nothing is stronger.

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  5. Empathy for you in my heart. I'm not sure that lasso is anything more or less then frozen. Sending you peace and love, tough girl. xoxo

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    Replies
    1. <3 Thank you, lady. It was a much warmer morning. :)

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  6. Damn, girl. I know you got this.....but what a sting.

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    1. Better now. It was the shock of the first time having that sort of interaction with him, and also because he's learning fast the effects of his words, and that words can be used as tools for better or worse.

      I suppose I should learn from it. He'll be teenager soon enough. ;)

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  7. I remember the first time a similar thing happened with my youngest son. It crushed my heart. Now, after nearly 20 years, it still crushes me.

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